I was recently asked to comment for an article on the subject of parenting a negative child. I’ve got two kids and when they get in bad moods, it ain’t pretty. I really feel for parents with kids who are negative all the time.
Every child is different, so I’m not sure there really is such thing as “parenting expert,” but I did offer the following advice to parents:
* Put yourself in check. Positivity and negativity are subjective concepts. Moms and dads bring their own perspectives into their parenting. Is the child really negative, or is it an extremely upbeat parent imposing an unreasonable expectation on their child?
* Replace expectations with acceptance. Children can be influenced but not molded by their parents. Mother Nature shapes their personality. The more adults try to defy or hurry Mother Nature, the more resistance they’ll get from the child. Create a positive environment, but allow children to develop at their own pace.
* Validate the child’s perspective. Like the rest of us, kids want to feel understood. A parent who can commiserate will win credibility and deepen their ability to influence their child.
I’d love any thoughts on this topic.
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- Interviewed by the Philadelphia and South New Jersey "Parents Express"
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- Crucial Skills To Teach Children
- The Value of Pain
- Self-Esteem or Self-Destruction
