Recently the California Association of Directors of Activities interviewed me for podcast. As a motivational speaker, I facilitate a considerable amount of student leadership training programs. Much of what I discuss is on how to bring out the best in others, including ways of helping student leaders overcome self-doubt and insecurity. In this podcast I discuss my “Fact. versus Feeling” technique for helping people distinguish between real problems and mere negative self-talk.
The basic idea is that when you’re feeling insecure, ask yourself if your negative conclusion is based on real fact, or just your feelings. Facts are objective and irrefutable. Anyone with the same information would draw the same conclusion. But if you’re problem is based on a feeling and you can’t back it up with facts, there’s a good chance it’s simply not true. Don’t ignore the feelings, but get the facts. They may lead you to a different conclusion.
You can also use this technique for handling criticism from others. Just because they say it doesn’t mean it’s true. So much of my job as a motivational speaker is helping people bounce back from the crippling effects of criticism. We take what others say way too seriously.
Next time someone passes judgement on you, ask yourself the same questions mentioned above. Is the commentary based on facts, or just the person’s feelings? If their opinion is not grounded in proof, don’t take it too seriously. If it is, consider it constructive and use it to improve. In all cases of criticism, though, remember that is says more about the critic than it does about you.
Listen to the podcast to explore this in a little more depth. I’ve got many student leadership training programs coming up, and you can be certain I’ll be discussing this subject live.
Related posts:
- Leadership Training for Middle School Students
- Spreading Yourself Too Thin
- Coping With Criticism
- Student Leadership Training – Deer Valley High School
- Student Leadership Training in Orange County
