Misery is the space between expectations and reality. Expectations manifest as our “I should’s.” I should make more money. I should be more attractive. I should have more success.
They also result in relationship “should’s.” He should be more affectionate. She should acknowledge me more. We should be intimate more often. Etc.
Sometimes we get too hung up on how we think things ought to be. This prevents us from accepting how things are. This resistance to reality creates tremendous stress and disappointment.
While you shouldn’t settle for less than what makes you happy, perhaps you should be more flexible. Your ideal vision for life may be limiting you. When you’re able to find satisfaction in life the way it is, you won’t have to wait to be happy. And when you can accept people for who they are rather than who you want them to be, it’ll be easier to love them.
This doesn’t mean we should abandon all ambition. Our desire for a better world is what creates a better world. But we shouldn’t allow this desire to undermine our ability to be grateful.
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- Helping Teens Choose a Career Path
- Motivational Speaker Tip: Finish What You Start
- Motivational Speaker Asks, “Are Your Pursuing Golden Goals or Plastic Trophies?”
- Three Tips for Parents Helping Teens Who Want a Part-Time Job
